Grace, Grace, God's Grace...

I love that song. I've had it in my head for days now.
A family at our church lost their 22 year old daughter in a car wreck early Friday morning. My heart has been breaking for them. I can't imagine the pain and the sorrow they feel right now.

I've been thinking about a lot of people lately that have lost children.

The O'Neill family lost 16 year old Sarah 11 years ago.

The Pearson family lost their 14 year old daughter and their 16 year old daughter had an extensive stay in ICU after a bad car wreck 2 years ago.

The Hinson's lost 3 year old Madison going on 6 years ago.

The Bookers lost their 3 hour old baby 3 years ago.

We knew a family that lost there 5 year old son on Christmas day in a car wreck.

The loss of a loved one is a terrible hard thing, the loss of a child, I can't even bear to imagine. It seems to be magnified if it happens during the holidays.
I have seen these families that have lost children. Some I have been closer to than others. But all of them, I have seen Gods grace completely cover them. I have seen them morn, but with hope.

I have heard the story of Jeff O'Neill witnessing to two teenage girls at the graveside of his only daughter and leading them to Christ.

I have read accounts of the Pearson family giving all the Glory to God for giving them their daughter for the time they had her.

I watched Mandy Hinson graciously ooh and ahh over my baby daughter, months after her little girl passed away.

I saw Christy Booker live out her faith every day, living in a new place far away from the comfort of old friends, as she prepared to deliver a son she knew would not live.

All of these people have had a dramatic impact on my Christian walk over the years. As I have seen these great children of God persevere through the unimaginable trial of losing a child, I have marveled at the grace that God gives to them to withstand the trial.

My heart breaks for the lost person that loses a child. Where is the hope? Where is the grace? Our pastors have really been driving home the fact that we need to be outward focused. Focusing on sharing the Gospel with the lost. I can feel the Lord burdening me in that area. I recently left a party where we had been with unbelievers. I left sad for them. Sad to see the emptiness in their lives that only God can fill. And not "God" in the way that our society portrays, but God the Father, God the Son, God the Holy Spirit. The God that sacrificed His Son for the purpose of redeeming me, a stupid, sinful, wretch of a person. The God that sacrificed His son, felt that anguish, and therefore has reserved a special kind of Grace for those that lose their own child.

I have seen Gods grace in my life more this year than I think at any time in my life. He gave me grace at a time in my marriage when I couldn't have stood up if not for His grace. He has continued to show Himself to me even when I buck Him and think I can do it on my own. How foolish of me to ever think that I can do anything apart from Him.

I am sometimes gripped with fear of losing a child. And while I pray that God blesses me with raising these 2 beautiful younguns for a long long time, I know that they are not mine alone. It was His grace in the first place that saw fit to entrust me with this responsibility. It is by His grace that I daily strive to raise Godly children and that I fight my flesh to be a Godly mother.
I am heartbroken for the ones I have known that have lost a child. But I am thankful that they allowed God to minister to their souls. I am humbled by their example and I am amazed at God's Grace.
Grace, Grace, God's Grace, Grace that is greater than all my sin.