Do you ever go through periods of time when you feel more Motherly than other times?
I think I'm going through that now.
I have been seeing in my kids lives so many more oppurtunities to really parent.
There are so many responsibilities and so many teachable moments that a Mom is given. I am quite sure that I fail at half of them and don't recognize a whole bunch either.
But either way, lately I feel like God is showing me some things that I need to address with my children.
There are several areas that I am really seeing development concerning Logan and I love the relationship that he and I are building as he gets older.
But right now my motherly burden is for my little LanaLou.
She is so wanting to be "grown up" and she is only 5 1/2 years old. This weekend when my brother was here with his girlfriend, Lana decided that she needed a boyfriend too. So on the way to a field trip she starts telling Kellie that Silas is her boyfriend and that she wants to kiss him!
What???? Did my 5 year old really just say that? Why is she trying so hard to impress somebody else?
Another time she was being a little crazy in her room and Kellie told her she should stop or her Mom might get mad at her....Lana's reply..."So, I don't care". Again I say What????
Saturday night we were all doing Karaoke on the x box. She had that microphone and was prancing around, shrugging those shoulders, tossing her hair, and acting like a teenager.
Lana is a little obsessed with her looks. She gets upset with me if I make her wear something she thinks doesn't make her look pretty. She can be so pouty. A pouty 5 year old? What will she be like when she's 13? It scares me. But I know that what I have is NOW. It is my responsibility to train her to be the Godly Woman I know she can grow up to be. I have these few short years to teach her that her worth is not in boys, or how she looks, or her hair, but rather in Christ. How many times will I have to remind her that God is concerned with her inside and not her outside?
Lana although she can be completly self obsurbed, can be the most caring child. She is always praying for other people and making things for others. She loves to make crafts for people that are sick, or give away something of hers to someone that needs it. She has a unique perspective and wisdom about things too. She has that definite child like faith and loves God with all of her 5 year old heart. She works on Lana time which is usually very very slow. But that slowness has made me stop and smell the roses on more than one occassion. If she sees a flower, she has to pick it. If she sees something sparkly she has to stop and look at it. She slows me down.
So here I am given the task of helping her find balance between this grown up side and the side of her that is still 5. I am convicted that I do not pray for my children enough. I have to be better about praying more specific things for her. I have to be more patient with her moody side. There are a lot of things that I have to do.
I am so thankful God gave me a girl even though I didn't think I wanted one. But I am very aware of the blessings and the burdens of having a daughter. Right now I am feeling very Motherly. I am feeling a lot of love for my kids, but also feeling the weight of my responsibilty to raise them in the Lord. I'm thankful for God's help in raising these little lives. And I'm thankful for the Gospel that is what I am to point them too!